Why toilets are such a decorating conundrum – and how to tackle them like an interior designer

A century or so on, the appearance of the loo hasn’t changed significantly since Elsie’s heyday, and, judging from the number of bathrooms that feature in House & Garden where the loo is deliberately out of shot, we still aren’t overly keen on either its aesthetics, or its existence. So, what do we do? Should we be hiding it in a cupboard, and indeed within other furniture (Elsie put one in a Louis XIV cane chair)? Or should we, in contrast, be celebrating it? According to the World Toilet Organisation, the average person spends three years of their life sitting on the loo – we pay extra for ‘luxury’ cinema seats for a film that only lasts three hours. Evidently, we need to get over any lingering embarrassment, and give real thought to this most necessary of household fixtures.

Regarding the location, ‘I can’t bear bathrooms without loos in them,’ says Olivia Outred.  ‘Horribly impractical.  What happens when your child needs an emergency wee during bathtime?‘  That said, ‘the loo, just like a telly, should not be the main feature of a room,’ she continues, ‘and not directly opposite the door.’ 

The loos at Annabel’s – visited by celebrities and their admirers – are ones to remember.

Milo Brown

‘I do think about views into bathrooms and where the loo should go so that it isn’t front and centre of every glimpse, as they aren’t usually the most attractive objects, and it is often not very easy to decorate around them to create beautiful scenes,’ agrees Brandon Schubert.

Martin Brudnizki is responsible for the interior design of night spot Annabel’s, which is home to the most Instagrammed loos in London (it is notable, though, that the loos themselves never actually feature, it’s more about the floral backdrop and the gilded swan taps). He says that he will sometimes put the loo in a separate place, because ‘couples often spend time in the bathroom together, [so it’s not] so much for aesthetic reasons but for personal ones that I’d advise someone to section off part of the existing room.’ It’s an approach that has been successfully employed by both Charlotte and Angus Buchanan of Buchanan Studio, who have created cabins in their bathroom for the shower and the loo, and Pallas Kalamotusis of Studio Krokalia.

However, there isn’t always room for an internal cabin, and while I have stripped a bathroom so that I can reposition the loo away from the open door, it’s not a budget option. (Nor have I yet reinstalled the bathroom – effectively, I allowed myself to be so upset by a loo that we’ve been one down for a year now – so let that be a cautionary tale.) 

‘If it isn’t possible to place a loo out of the way, then I favour trying to make it look as nice as possible,’ says Brandon. ‘That might involve using a concealed cistern with joinery around it, so that the focus is more on the shelves or panelling, or at least having a shelf behind the loo so you can put some nice things on top. Or, in more traditional interiors, we might use a high-level cistern with lovely pipework just so that it at least looks interesting rather than ordinary.’